After everything that happened in 2020, I just wanted to forget and move on and so, I started 2021 without being intentional about the things I wanted and the goals I wanted to achieve.
So dear reader, I took whatever 2021 handed to me because I didn’t allow myself to want much. At some point, I felt like I didn’t even deserve much. It was almost as if I was comfortable where I was and that was my mistake.
I won’t be making the same mistake this year. I am no longer comfortable where I’m at and I want to enjoy all the good things life has to offer in 2022 and more.
In 2022, I want to be proud of myself, love myself, accept myself and stop hiding in the shadows. I don’t want to compare myself to others and I want to be able to speak up for what I believe in and defend what is right with my chest.
In 2022, I want to work towards my growth financially, spiritually, emotionally, and physically because why should I remain stagnant?
In 2022, I want to be happy, not for a while but for a long time. I want to be content, grateful for the things I have while not losing hope and faith. I want to be fulfilled in every aspect of life and I want to be at peace with all men.
In 2022, I don’t want to be an option, I want to be the main selection. I don’t want to be anyone’s second choice, I want to be the only choice. I want to throw being fake in the dustbin because that’s where it belongs.
In 2022, I want to be forgiving, I don’t want to lose anyone, and I want to say “I love you” only when I mean it and I want the people that say they love me to love truly and love me for all that I am.
In 2022, I am going to get all the things I want because I deserve them. I hope this year is ready for me because I am ready.
How about you?
Happy New Year’s Eve! I’ll be seeing you in 2022.
Describe your year inone word.
What’s one thing you’re hoping to achieve in 2022?
Please make use of the comments box below. You know how much I enjoy reading from you! 💜
Life is funny, in many ways than one. Personally, I think the funniest aspect of life is how someone could be here one day and gone the next. I don’t think I’ll ever wrap my head around it, especially since losing someone I care about is one of my fears.
In the space of one year, I lost two people I cared about. How do others do it? How do they remain so strong? Uncle D left us in October 2020. I cried when I was telling Granny. She shook her head and sympathized with me. Who would have thought that we’d lay her to rest just a year after? It was a lot for me, tbh. She left us when I was in camp and I didn’t even get to say goodbye.
They say it gets easier but does it? Does it really? That’s life for you anyway. Like I said, life is funny.
Let me tell you about my Granny, the only grandparent I ever knew. I won’t be able to tell you about her the way her biography did (you can read it in the PDF file below) but I’ll tell you about her the way I knew her.
Granny told me that I was the first person to call her “Granny”. I knew her by this name before I ever knew her name. This was the name she was fondly called by everyone who knew her.
My Grandmother was beautiful, both inside and out. For as long as I can remember, Granny always made sure that I had Starch and Banga soup to eat anytime I came visiting. She cooked with love and Sunday afternoons were my best because we had all the rice to eat. She sewed beautiful clothes for us and even when she couldn’t do these anymore, she made sure we got them. I remember her sending Beatrice to buy Starch for me and I remember her giving Sophia directions on how to cut fabric for sewing. She was a giver. She always made sure you left her house with somthing, no matter how small. She devoted her time, all the time. When I had a major accident when I was little, she stayed in the hospital with me until I recovered, not minding the inconvenience.
Granny was great company. She was always ready to listen to all of my rants and there’s no way you could have a conversation with her without breaking into laughter because Granny spoke fluent sarcasm. I looked forward to the advice she gave because she always encouraged us to be better than we are. She reminded us to be focused and that God was number one in our lives. When she prayed, Granny would always end with “remain blessed”.
Granny was hardworking. She expected us to be up early in the morning and by 5:00 am, she already had her morning tea. On the times when we didn’t wake up early, she’d come to pinch us. I used to grumble because she used to wake me up when the sleep was the sweetest but I would give anything to have her pinch me right now. She didn’t tolerate laziness and she loved it when her house was clean. We learned early enough to just do what Granny asked us to do because she would disturb you until you had complied. She took care of us.
Words cannot perfectly describe the fond memories I have of her and words cannot describe how much I miss her, how much we miss her. What I miss most about Granny is her laughter. Her laughter was soft like music and it made me smile. I remember her watching me and shaking her head with laughter, probably thinking “this my grandpikin ehn”. I also miss analyzing movies with her. Granny would not allow you watch a movie till the end without telling you the plot and asking questions. I also miss her hugs. Every time I was going back to school, Granny would pull me into a hug and pray for me. The last time I told her goodbye before going to school, she kissed my forehead and said “remain blessed”.
So Granny, Degwo. You’re gone now but you’re still alive in our hearts. I am blessed because you were in my life. I am blessed because I got to call you my grandmother. I still hear your voice in my head and I always imagined that you’d be here forever. You were here my whole life! I am not going to think about all the things that I won’t get to do with you anymore because I had 22 beautiful years with you. I am grateful for these memories and I will make you proud.
I know you’re in a better place because you loved the Lord and served Him with all your heart. I know you are resting in Peace. I love you so much.
Granny lived. She did. She was laid to rest on the 26th of November at Odi, Bayelsa state. I don’t know how to round this up except to say that I don’t want to lose anyone again. I don’t think I’ll be able to handle it so I pray that God in His infinite mercy will keep us all.