Posted in Random

Remember Me?

7 months. 7 months is a long time to go without publishing. How could I have stayed away for so long? Circumstances. Circumstances beyond my control. I wasn’t even gone for this long when my phone was stolen in 2017 before I published “Phone-Napped”.

I feel like I have to re-introduce myself and this space again so hi, I’m ‘Ruona. I love sharing my thoughts with you here on Ruonaahsculture. You’d find everything from my personal stories to why I think we should sell Nigeria on eBay – I know, I have weird thoughts sometimes.

‘Ruona until I change my name or something.

If you’re new here, welcome to my little corner of the Internet. This place is filled with positive vibes only. If you’re a regular reader of my blog and have been wondering where I’ve been, I’m back now, and I’ve missed sharing my thoughts with you. I was heartbroken at not being able to post for such a long time, but I had so many other things to attend to. I’m back, and I won’t leave you hanging, I promise.

A lot has happened and I’ll tell you about them in future posts, but here are some highlights:

  • I now live in Gombe State because the Federal Government of Nigeria felt that I should explore the North. Me that wanted to go to Lagos to chill with the big boys? Lol.
  • I’ve begun to find myself doing adult things like paying bills and planning. Nobody told me that it was this hard. God has been faithful.
  • I lost my Granny, the only Grandparent I ever knew. It still feels so unreal.
  • If you’re looking for someone to award “Best in traveling”, look no further except you know someone that has spent more than two days on the road.
  • I hosted my very first writing challenge on Instagram and it was a success.
  • I’ve made mistakes and learned lessons. I’m beginning to see life for what it really is.
  • I’ve met nice people and made friends. I don’t take them for granted.

Let’s just say that life happened and I’m not the same person I was 7 months ago. I hope you’re ready for Ruonaahsculture ‘cos she’s not going anywhere.

No seriously, are you ready?

Please subscribe to Ruonaahsculture if you’ve not (the box is below) and tell a friend to tell a friend that I’m back.

See you in a couple of days.

Love,

‘Ruona. ❤️

P.S:

Special shout out to my sponsors, Alice (😉) & Davies + every other person that showed concern for my blog when it was down. I don’t take you guys for granted.

How have you been?

Tell me one major thing that has happened in your life from May till now.

What are you looking forward to reading on Ruonaahsculture?

Please, make use of the comments section below. I’ll read your grocery lists if you put them down – that’s how much I love reading from you. Thank you! 💜

Posted in Random

THE DEPENDENCY SYNDROME

Hello!

I’m not about to make excuses for my absence because I was on a well-deserved holiday but I’m back because you missed me.

How have you been? (Please answer this question in the comment box ‘cos I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t care). I’ve been okay except that I don’t understand why my money is running away from me. I’ve been receiving debit alerts that I didn’t bargain for. I mean, you breathe – you have to pay for something. You go outside – more debit alerts. It’s not even fun here. Sigh.

I’m not poor in Jesus name but send me money 🤲🏼.

I heard the “dependency syndrome” phrase a few weeks ago and it sounded nice in my head so I made a mental note to myself to publish a blog post on it. Low key, I’m hoping that this doesn’t disappoint ‘cos it’s one thing for a phrase to sound nice, but it’s another ball game entirely when you have to do research based on the phrase in order to curate an entire blog post that people will derive information from. Please read to the end so you can give me feedback.

The Dependency Syndrome refers to the idea that a person or group of people cannot solve its own problems without outside assistance. It is a flaw that has been made worse by charity.

The GIF above is just a child dragging after her mum but it’s an actual representation of what I just explained because the people who suffer from dependency syndrome cannot do anything on their own. Actually, the issue is not that they can’t. It’s that they don’t want to. They would rather depend on others for their survival and in some cases, drag them down in the process. It’s typical leech behavior.

There is nothing wrong with needing assistance from people because there are times when a person will need support and it’s okay. It only becomes a problem when a person becomes totally comfortable with receiving handouts from people without making any real effort to improve his/her circumstances. It becomes an issue of receive today, squander, and wait for the next gift to come without actually doing anything.

If we look around, we’ll find people like that in our society today. They don’t want to work. They’d rather fold their hands and beg from door to door instead of doing something about their situation. You’ll find such people in some extended families where some members are wealthier than the rest and have taken on the responsibility of providing for the others who are not so better off. For example, you give your brother/sister a capital of about 300,000 Naira to start a business so it can become a source of income to his/her family and he/she’s calling you a month later to ask for “assistance” because some “issues” came up and he/she has “no one else” to turn to. What’s it called? Dependency Syndrome.

Also, there are countries that are totally dependent on aid from other countries and will keep borrowing large sums from other countries and keep incurring debts instead of generating different forms of revenue.

If a country relies on aid, it’ll develop a dependency syndrome.

Hussein Mar Nyot

What do we say to people and countries like these?

And no, we’re not giving you any more aid because who came to this world with you? You want people to help you but you’re not helping yourself. Why? Why would you choose to solely depend on people for your survival when it’s not like you’re incapacitated? It’s wrong and it’s not a good look on you because the dependency syndrome is parasitic in nature.

The dependency syndrome in medical terms refers to addiction and in a way, it’s the same thing because the way addicts find it difficult to do without such drugs and alcohol, is the same way people cannot do without asking for help from other people. They become leeches and in a way, the dependency syndrome enslaves them in mediocrity.

Depend on Jesus alone.

Did I mention that the dependency syndrome does not only have to do with financial support? As a matter of fact, when you totally depend on people to make you happy or boost your self esteem, you suffer from dependency syndrome whether you like it or not.

Our dependency makes slaves out of us, especially if this dependency is a dependency of our self-esteem. If you need encouragement, praise, pats on the back from everybody, then you make everybody your judge.

Fritz Perls

Imagine what people will say about you as a person if you make dependency syndrome a lifestyle. There’s nothing wrong with depending on yourself and putting effort into improving your circumstances for a change. You don’t want people to get tired of helping you do you?

Well, hope you have an amazing weekend and Easter! 🥳

Love,

‘Ruona ❤️

P.S:

I’m really serious about this money thing. Where do you guys see this money? 😩

Was this blog post to your liking? What did you get out of it?

What do you think about the dependency syndrome? Do you know people that are solely dependent on others?

What do you do when you begin to notice that a person is solely dependent on you and is not making any effort to help himself/herself?

Admit it – You missed me.

Please drop your comments in the comment box below. There’s this joy that comes from reading and replying to them 💜.